It’s not weird to be weird

Dear Lord.  Thank you for your guidance and direction. I did what you said with my boss and did not press the issue about the concerns I was having and believe it was the right thing to do.

I’m thinking about what to ask you about.

You don’t have to ask me anything. We can just be together.

Ok, that’s something I can ask. What does that really mean – “be together”. How do I ‘hang out’ with you?

Well, you don’t have to ask a question in order to say something to me. Your questions are good, but they’re not the only means of our communion. In fact, if you had a relationship with someone where the only conversation you had revolved around your questions for them, it would be a very one-sided relationship. I love you so deeply that I will be here for you no matter what and no matter how often, but there are other components to the relationship.

I understand. Like what?

Like appreciation for one.

Praise and worship.

Yes

Ok, what else?

Michael, you’re doing it again. How about you talk to me without questions for one prayer.

Ok…

How are you feeling today?

I feel good. I feel like I have good energy today. I’m also feeling good that the issue I’m having with one of my employees is going to come to a head. It will be a difficult couple of weeks, but the end is very likely near and that is relieving that we can move on from it.

That’s good. I’ll be with you throughout.

Thank you Lord

What else? What’s on your mind that you want to share with me? Not ask, but share.

…

I’m excited in the direction my life is going with my focus on living by my intentions. As you know, I am using a website called Mindbloom that is helping me organize and measure my intentions, which I think really helps.

That’s wonderful. It’s great to see as well.

What else Micheal. Don’t stop this prayer because you’re uncomfortable. Grow through the challenge. How are you feeling?

I feel good that we’re reconnecting. It’s like I’m reconnecting with my best friend.

For me as well.

I feel bad that my wife and I haven’t been consistent with going to small group.

Don’t feel bad. They are there for you when you need them to be. They won’t shut you out.

But I was hoping to make friendships.

Were you?

What do you mean? Of course I was.

I’m not so sure. What motivations do you think you had in joining the small group?

Making Christian friends, building relationship with Jen, sharing what I’ve learned with others, seeing our old dog, giving the kids some opportunity to make new friends, …

A lot of that is true, but you’re missing something important.

Please tell me…

You’re missing you.

What does that mean?

You didn’t let me finish.  You’re missing you and me.

I am aren’t I… You’re right of course, growing, and really re-connecting in my relationship with you was a central reason for joining the small group.

Michael, friends aren’t an ‘end’, they’re a ‘means’. You don’t have friends to have friends. You have friends for the support they provide. Your focus is on the wrong thing. Plus, you think you don’t need anyone else’s support.

You’re right…

You’ve had challenges in your life and you’ve responded by hardening to other people. You’ll be nice, but you won’t open up, in fear of being hurt again.

That’s true, but I started to open up in the group, and got the feeling like I was ‘getting weird’ or something.

Michael, you ARE weird, but that is not weird. It’s not weird to be weird. Everyone has their own personality and quirks. The key is to lay yourself out on the table so that you attract the right people in to your life. You don’t want people to want to be your friend because of some act you’re putting on. You don’t have to act cool. Just be yourself, and if it’s cool, then you’ll attract like-minded people, if not, then you’ll attract like-minded people.

I understand. Thank you Lord.